Judging Others (5/28/10)

At some point in our life we started to notice others judging us. We discovered not everyone liked us and that some individuals felt the need to express this dislike not only to us, but to everyone around us.

This action made us feel bad about ourselves and we responded by judging them back. This defense mechanism took hold of our lives and became habit. We took this habit and made it such a part of our being that now we find it very difficult to separate this from who we are.

Our anger at others can be so great and our habit of getting back at others so strong, that we end up lashing out with hatred and judgment toward others. Not only do we react toward those who judge us, but anyone who does something we do not like. Little by little, we slowly lose who we truly are. We build walls of judgment and hate around our souls and end up forgetting that judgment and hatred are paths to self destruction.

These walls prevent us from appreciating our own goodness and respecting ourselves. Over time we become more and more miserable and full of pain and despair. We eventually will see that our behavior is not what it should be, but do not understand how we can possibly change.

We can stop this destructive behavior. Habits can be broken and we can free ourselves from the prison we have built around ourselves.

How do we break the habit? Well we must first love and then forgive ourselves. Nothing can replace self-love and forgiveness. If we cannot love or forgive ourselves, how can we possibly forgive others?

It will take a conscious effort to forgive. Just as with any habit, we must force ourselves out of the negative behavior. Each conscious act of forgiveness starts to break down the walls we have created. As we begin to forgive wrong doings or things we have done, we find the strength to forgive others. One builds upon the other until instead of judging, forgiveness becomes our new habit.

Our minds will be clearer and our hearts will be free. Our capacity for love will grow until all things have been forgiven. We then will be in a state of gratitude for what we have learned and the joy we bring to others.